A typical example of indecisiveness is the girl-friend of a friend of mine. This guy is a real gem and although she does appreciate it, it has been for more than an year that she has not yet dumped, though she has at least decided to do it, her ex-boyfriend, whom I can describe rather precisely in one word – trash! This guy is a real loser, ugly and a drunkard, additionally his job is something that makes many people laugh and as rumor goes – he is bisexual and has a male friend as well.

No, the girl is not just a stupid bitch who enjoys being with as many guys as possible. She is rather intelligent and good-looking. And of course, she attracts quite a lot of male attraction but most guys give up, when they see that she is so hooked to the loser. This is quite logical – nobody would share her with an idiot like her ex (or would be ex-) friend. But my friend is just stubborn and knows that it takes time and a lot of patience to make her dump the loser. As a matter of fact he also considered dumping her because he also is an attractive guy and has quite a lot of female admirers but he decided that he will not give up!

And this is not the only couple I can think of! I know many couples who are (or were) in a similar situation but what is worse, I know even more couples who represent a very strange co-existence between Mr. Nice Guy and a street whore or a beautiful, intelligent lady and a criminal. I don't know if there is such a statistics about what percentage of the couples fall in this group but I think that this is not a rare exception. Well, maybe it is not always an outlaw (in the sense of criminals) or a disgusting prostitute but it is really common to see how good girls and boys fall out for the bad ones.

I have heard many explanations of this phenomenon – starting from “Leave him/her! If he/she is so stupid to stand a bitch/bastard like this one, this is what he/she deserves!” to “Oh, poor creature, can't somebody save him/her from the claws of this bitch/bastard!”. Well, I myself don't perceive people in such relationships as victims. It is unlikely that somebody has forced them to enter the relationship and above all – to stay there. What is more, even if there is somebody to save them, it looks like they do not want to be saved because they are so reluctant to go their part of the way.

Maybe the explanation that I personally consider as more creditable is that bad guys and girls are perceived as the “real thing”. They are cool and so Hollywood like, while Mr. Nice Guy or Ms. Nice Girl are boring. The Nice Ones are reliable and they will be always there, when you need them. In a sense this is perceived as something as sure as hell – there is no need to make efforts to win him or her, because they are already booked for you. Instead, you go chasing (or more often leave yourself being chased and eaten) by the Predators, who are cool, unreliable, dirty but the fact that it is YOU (hm, what makes you thing that you are their only toy-boy or toy-girl) who have them (from time to time, when THEY please) fills you with pride. Since they have chosen you, you must be a great game!

Needless to say that this type of a relationship is a very unfair one and you are the screwed party. However, you can't say that you are the victim because the fact that this relationship still exists, i.e. you have not terminated it, makes it your fault. And if you still keep the relationship going because you hope that you might get him or her out of the dirt, you'd better forget it. Most likely it will be you who will be covered with dirt as well, rather than make him or her clean and nice!